Words I won’t ever say to my dad

You tell me the world is vicious daddy
because you’ve looked it in the eye
but it’s my turn now
so won’t you let me fly.

You tell me there are storms out there
that I won’t be able to bear
but you’ve molded me with your own hands
then why do you have this fear?

How long will you keep me in the comfort of your nest?
Don’t you trust that light you planted in my chest?

You’ve carved me into this pillar
that does not know how to bow
if you want me to stay down here
then come show me how.

It was you who told me that when I rise
I shouldn’t come back down
yet you complain and tell me
that I’m better off on the ground.

The winds are too harsh
you tell me each and every day
the forests are too cruel
you whine in every way.

There are vultures out there
you tie my hands, so I wouldn’t leave
the mountains will break you
you tell me I’m naive.

You twist your words
and then you scream
convincing me
that I shouldn’t dream.

But you don’t understand
in this tight space of yours
I can’t seem to breathe.

You’ve put your strings around me
to keep me grounded to this floor
but by doing so your hurting me even more.

I know you’re pulling me down
because you don’t trust the world
but how do you not have faith in your little girl?

You’re the one who taught me
that I should laugh at every ache
because I will tear, rip but I won’t ever break.

Maybe I’m not strong, maybe I will crack
but daddy you’re the only hope I have.

I know you care,
and you don’t want to see me hurt
but how will I ever rise if I don’t kiss the dirt.

You don’t want to see me in pain
it breaks your heart
because if I ever crash it will tear you apart.

I know
the world is filled with devils
who’ll point their fingers at you if I ever tremble
but it’s through you that I’ve learned
how to make the earth rumble.

I know you’re afraid
that the demons will laugh at me and you
so teach me how to rise
so we could both make it through.

I don’t know what aches your carrying
or what scars you’re trying to hide
but why are you stopping me
from touching those skies.

You’ve held my hand
to teach me how to walk
you’ve given me your words
so I could have a voice to talk.

You’ve stayed up late nights
and spent so many restless days
you’ve toiled so much
just so I could be okay.

You’ve given up your youth
to give me this life
you’ve burned all your dreams
because you wanted me to thrive.

Since I was born you saw a dream for me
I know your ground is safe
but it’s not the sky I see

I’m chasing an empty horizon
and your scared that I’ll lose
I want to kiss the stars daddy
just once walk in my shoes.

If I crash
I know you’ll be mad
and you’ll ache all over
but if I ever fall daddy
I’ll always need your shoulder

If I shatter just promise me
you’ll pick me up
you’ll make me indestructible
so I wouldn’t ever stop.

Daddy
you’ll always be my first prince
but let me take my throne
I belong on the battlefield
not in castles made of stone.

You’re scared that I won’t be able to ride my own horse
or I won’t be able to slay my own dragons
and I know you’ll say that’s enough
but daddy
if I ever lower my head my crown will slip off.

Trust me…
I can train an army in a dress
and I can fight in heels
you haven’t taught me how to back down
but watch me make the world kneel.

For once daddy…
Instead of pulling me back
and instead of saying ‘No’
why don’t you just smile
push me
and tell me to go.

Why don’t you look at the world through my eyes
and then maybe you’ll see why
I’m so desperate to reach those skies.

So daddy…
with tears streaming down my face
I want you to hold my hand this one last time
walk with me to the horizon as I take my flight.

Poetry book: Curing My Venom

Photo by Bess Hamiti from Pexels